Five Things I am Doing in Preparation for Marriage and Life

1714I’m not engaged, I’m not in a relationship, I not in the “like-like” stage, I don’t have a crush, I am single. I used to loathe saying that. Every time I said or thought those three words I felt like the ugly step-sister who had nothing going for her. I guess in a sense I was right, and not just in the fact that I have a step-sister. I had an ugly heart that was self-consumed, greedy, jealous, and immature. But I did have something going for me, I had Jesus. In the long run, my relationship with God is the only thing that is going for me. Without Him, I am nothing.

I don’t know if God has marriage in His plan for my life. If it is, then I want to be prepared. If it’s not, then I want to be prepared. And this is what I am doing to prepare myself.

I am growing as a Christian instead of assuming that I will ‘follow’ my husband spiritually. If I am to be a godly woman, I need to be constantly growing and learning about God. I am ever-growing closer to my heavenly father. My husband could never replace that. He could bring me closer to the cross, but he can’t bring me all the way there.

I am spending more time being myself instead of being available. I have spent so much time waiting around for a guy to text me asking to hang out. I tried to dress like his sisters, do things he was interested in, volunteering at events he was attending. (yes, I know. Creepy.) But all I did was ruined that relationship, open my heart to hurt, and desert who God made me in order to impress a guy who was oh-so handsome. I was blinded to anything else. I have learned since then that if God has a man out there for me, then he will love my quirkiness. We can be ourselves together.

I am living as a godly woman today, rather than thinking “I’ll be like that when I’m married.” I’m not going to lie, I used that excuse this morning when I convinced myself that eating 5 mini butterfingers and watching Netflix instead of drinking a healthy fruit smoothie and folding laundry was a more worthwhile and productive use of my time. But I’m not just talking about eating healthy and doing chores, I’m talking about living a godly lifestyle. Instead of constantly saying ‘tomorrow,’ I need to obey today!

I am becoming involved in more service in the church, especially where no one can see me. I was born with an extra-large ego and never did anything for someone else unless I got my due attention. To this day I need help in regards to diminishing my ego.

Matthew 6:2-4 ““Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they maybe praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret.And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.”

I think it is essential for everyone whether single or married to learn to serve for the glory of God, not for the glory of themselves.

I am learning to communicate clearly.  Yeah, I still have a lot of work to do with this one. I have trouble with listening to others and speaking what I’m thinking in a godly and loving way. Communication is vital in every single area in our lives, especially relationships.

So there you have it! Five things that I am doing today in order to glorify God tomorrow. What are you doing?

Married and Older Women: What are some pieces of advice you would give single girls?

With Blessings,

~Rebekah Elaine


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